MMmmmppphhh

That's what I feel like today... There's all this stuff swirling around in my head that REALLY wants to come out, but I can't quite string together all the synapses in the correct order to get it to my fingertips.

Freezing rain, sleet, snow, then a little more freezing rain today and now it's about 25 degrees. It's not one of the really bad ice storms that has trees falling through people's roofs, but they thought it was going to be. It's just enough to make going out kinda dangerous and dumb. I think they got it worse to the South as the club cancelled their weekly party tonight.

Isn't it strange how knowing that you have to stay in makes you want to get out SO bad? I sit in this house all day, all week long, and may want to go out, but it's no big deal. Today with the roads being icy, I am just *dying* to get out of the house. I am bored out of my friggin' mind and nothing helps. Today has felt about 3 days long.

I am really looking forward to the day when I have my own hot tub. Tonight would be a perfect night for some soakin'.

I'm thinking about seeing if S&L want to come over since the party was cancelled. They've got the truck, so they might be able to make it (the roads aren't *that* bad.. I don't think). The question - How to entertain? The entertainment center is half apart and at the moment we don't have any movies we haven't seen.. yet another argument for the hot tub. I'm calling them now.

L said the roads are getting really, really bad (10 car pileup at the exit where the club is) and they are going to play it smart and stay home.. but if they get too bored, they may call later.

Looks like another boring night at home. I've played every game on the PS/2 that I like, upgraded the software on my CLT DoD site including fixing photopost, watched 2 movies, surfed until I couldn't see straight, cleaned up my email, even organized my bookmarks. What is left to do? What in the world did we all do before computers, cable and to-your-doorstep dvd rentals, and video games? I remember spending a lot of time as a child watching tv and wishing I had something better to do, but I don't remember being THIS damned bored.

To my readers (if any): Sorry if it seems like I'm bitching a lot this week. 1st week not smoking does that to a person, I guess.

I have very little positive to say, and the thoughts swirling through my mind aren't getting any closer to my fingertips, so I guess I'll stop rambling now.

Through the Vaseline-Coated Looking Glass with My Head Tilted Curiously to the Side

Hello boys and girls!

My eyes are *so* bleary. 14 hours of staring at the screen yesterday, 12 today. I don't know how people do this for 8 hours with a crappy monitor and/or with super-small text like some of my co-workers do.

I had planned on inviting S&L over tonight for a movie, but haven't heard back from the last two emails I've sent.. they might be out of town or still having computer issues. I was going to call them, but just got a call from D&M asking if we want to go out. I guess it'd be kind of rude to say no and then invite S&L over.

I know what I'm in the mood for... Either a steak or a Hardees 2/3lb Bacon Cheeseburger and a Coke. Followed by a smoke and a beer.

Instead, Hmm, let's see, what's on the menu for tonight:

- A veggie burger (which not only doesn't taste like a burger, but is the size of a cheap sausage patty)
- 2 cups mixed greens with a whopping 2 Tbsp of non-fat dressing.
- 1 cup skim milk
- 1 serving fruit of choice.

That will be followed by a craving for a smoke and a cup of hot water. Then some household chores and a cold shower.

Man, I really need to start getting out of the house at least once during the week. My outlook on things really sucks by Friday. Yup, gotta get out more often at least until spring when I can spend some quality time soaking in the sun. SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) seems to get worse every year. That's not entirely true, this year hasn't been too bad so far. If I make it through Feb (without sinking into the the dark abyss of depression), things will be fine.

I've got to find a way to get these dogs some exercise. I think Buddy is more depressed than I am. Sometimes I walk up and pet him and he doesn't even bother to move his eyes.

19:40 - Update on the mail issue. After going through the logs, I determined the email was never received. Skip sent another message that got through. Very strange... almost like Mindspring either deleted the mail queue or turned off the mail server. But.. thinking about this more, it was 4 days that we didn't receive mail from them, which means they've probably got a mail server that's actively receiving mail but nothing sending. Oh well. At least it's working for them now.



I'm going to watch a movie, and hopefully fall asleep and wake to a much brighter day. Let's hope that ice storms misses us!

Bumpers, Gas, and Fat

I can't get over how expensive it is to heat this house, especially as well as it retains heat. We've been here since the end of August. There was about $250 in the the tank, Next time around was nearly $600 (mostly due to the previous owner not filling it - he was unemployed), The next time, $280, this time $392. Even subtracting $300 of that $600 (of which $300 was probably our usage) and not including the $250 that was already there, that's $750 worth of gas (which is only used for heat and hot water) in 4.5 months. Considering Sept and Oct were warm, there were a few warm weeks somewhere this winter, and we were in MI with the heat off for a week, this just seems insanely expensive.

I love gas heat (had natural gas in the house where I grew up in MI... Heat pumps won't do the job up there), it heats fast. I don't think I'll ever have a propane gas pack again. This is nuts. This house is not *that* big, the heat is off in the basement and upstairs, with the ceiling fan keeping the heat on the first floor and the thermostat set on 68 degrees. I'm beginning to think a kerosene "jet" garage heater might be a cheaper, if more toxic solution.

This diet... it's strange. Some days I feel like I don't want to eat everything on it, other days (like today), I feel like I'm starving. I think the frozen entree I had at lunch just wasn't filling enough. Odd since it was pasta and meatballs.. you'd think it would be the most filling meal yet.

Not smoking - It's going well; or shall I say I haven't smoked? Today has been challenging. I can almost feel myself taking a "drag" off a smoke. I guess that's because it's been a stressful day. I never really noticed myself smoking much when stressed. I'm usually more of a bored smoker.. if there's nothing to do, I smoke. These cravings have caught me a little off-guard.

Work has been busy today.. 2 or 3 things to do simultaneously at the same time I'm on conference calls AND chatting (work chat) with several people.

I called Gene yesterday and invited him to go riding.. It was already going to be cutting it close with the time of day (3:30?) and him having to find the plate, get the bike, make sure it starts, and riding out here. I called about an 1.5 hours after he said he was "going now", and he said he was just leaving the house. I was concerned with it getting dark and the roads being slightly damp that it may get cold enough for some black ice (additionally, he hadn't rode in months), so I told him we'd catch up some other time.

Just as well.. I had one of, if not *the* worst ride (not including crashes) of my life. People cutting me off, pulling in front of me, objects in the road, one of which nearly threw me off the bike, and I got *really* lost. What was supposed to be a nice leisurely 90 mile ride through some twisty roads leading to the mountains ended up being over 200 miles of going through every small town in 6 or 7 counties (or at least it seemed that way).

Ok, I'm done bitching now. On to the good news:

I've got 4 motorcycle trips planned already for this year. Spring Ride, Deal's Gap, Honda Hoot, and Grand Canyon. Early next year, I'm going to get an Adventure Touring bike, most likely one of either a BMW R 1200 GS, Triumph Tiger, Suzuki SV-1000, or Aprilia Caponard. I've pretty much narrowed it down to the BMW or Triumph. I've got enough mainstream bikes, I want something with a little more character. Something that says "I may be a little ugly, but I'm so useful, I can take you anywhere" and to strangers says "you just *know* I've been around the globe, you want to touch me and soak in my worldly knowledge, don't you?".

We've found a suite of utilities that may resolve about 50% of the communication/process issues we've been having with one of our biggest internal customers. I'm working late installing it now. This is going to be awesome if we can modify it the way I think we can.

Traded oncall weeks with another team member. No oncall for me this weekend. Woo-hoo!

(note: this copy was posted on the web page. If another one shows up, it was sent via email)

Wonders of Nature?

I sit here staring out my window when I'm supposed to be working. After a week of bitterly cold weather, it's suddenly (within the last 2 hours) 52 degrees!

I watch the small bird (a robin?) outside my window taking a bath in
the ice water and wonder.. how can such a small animal that by
necessity for flight, has almost no meat/fat on it's body take a bath
in ice water and not be cold... Yet I sit here in a heated home with
slippers, socks, jeans, a heavy shirt, and a flannel shirt on, sipping
hot tea, and I'm chilled.

Is the bird cold or not? Does it have B.O. (that's "Bird Odor") so bad
that it has to take bath no matter how cold it is? Does it perhaps
think the seemingly warm weather will keep it safe even though it is
freezing it's butt off? WILL the weather keep it warm enough
until it dries?... or will this little bird take flight, turn into a
block of ice and drop like a rock?

I know they are warm blooded. I also know the feathers and plumage keep them from losing body heat as quickly as we do; but if I was to wrap myself in a nice warm quilt, soaked in ice water, and then stand in a 20 MPH wind, I wouldn't last very long. Will the bird?

Yes, today is a busy day for me.